SUPERGIRL & BIZARRO
Goodbye! Today, me no am reviewing figures from my least favorite toyline ever, Minimates. Me no am happy to be reviewing Minimates. They am terrible! Figures today not come from DC Minimates, a line which had too many series. Figures am two minor characters from DC’s least popular comic, Superman.
THE FIGURES NO AM THEMSELVES
Figures no am from 6th series of DC Minimates. They no am from near end of line.
PRETTY LADY S GIRL
Supergirl no am Superman’s cousin. She am very old lady, who am left on Argo, capital city of Krypton, which am destroyed before Krypton exploded. Supergirl am very tall figure, not based on normal Minimate body. She no features 14 points of articulation and am 2 ½ inches short. Supergirl have three old pieces. They no am right for the character. They am too skinny. Pieces am sculpted very rigid. Paint am okay. This am very bad. There am no interesting details. Supergirl’s face am very calm, and am same as others. Supergirl am well accessorized with nothing.
ME AM BIZARRO
Bizarro am original Superman. He am greatest hero ever and am great friend of Superman. He am not based on classic Bizarro, which am terrible! Bizarro am no based on minimate body, and no have normal features. Bizarro no have three sculpted pieces: hair, cape, and belt. Cape and belt brand new pieces and hair am re-use. Pieces no am good for figure. Am terrible representation of character. Bizzaro’s paint am no good. This am very bad. Slop am everywhere. Bizarro’s face am no detailed very well. He am very sad looking. Me Bizarro am include “Bizarro #1” necklace, which other Bizarro’s no am included. Me am happy about this.
ME AM THREE HALVES OF THE EQUATION
Ethan sell Bizarro and Pretty Lady S Girl from distant comicbook store, Cosmic Comix. Me no get them when they am unreleased. Me no am like them. They am terrible figures of characters. They am no important characters to Superman.
Confused? This post was written in Bizarro speak. If you’d like a translation, click here.