VINCENT “FALCON” FALCONE

G.I. JOE: CLASSIFIED SERIES (HASBRO)

I’ve admittedly slowed down pretty severely around here with reviews of Hasbro’s current go at G.I. Joe, their 6-inch scale Classified Series line.  My last one was Sgt Slaughter, which was all the way back in February.  I’ve got my reasons for that, and they’re gonna become pretty apparent here rather shortly.  But, as I mentioned in my aforementioned Sgt Slaughter review, I do have a soft spot for 1987’s G.I. Joe: The Movie and its focus characters.  And, central to the whole movie is Falcon, Hasbro’s proposed replacement for Duke as the franchise’s face, who perhaps didn’t pan out quite the way they were expecting.  Falcon’s hardly a rarity to toys, but it does tend to take him a minute to show up in any given style shift for the line.  Three years into Classified, here he is.  Let’s look at that, I guess.

THE FIGURE ITSELF

Vincent “Falcon” Falcone, as Falcon has been renamed since 2011 so as to avoid confusion with other “Falcons”, is figure 64 in the Classified Series line-up.  He’s part of the latest assortment for the line (though they’ve officially switched to only solid cases of the figures at this point), and he’s a mass-release figure.  The figure stands 6 1/4 inches tall and he has 35 points of articulation.  Falcon has the same standard layout for articulation that we’ve seen on most of the line, with the only adjustment being the inclusion of pinless construction on his elbows and knees.  The articulation works for the most part, and keeping consistent articulation schemes across a whole line of figures is a pretty G.I. Joe thing to do.  Falcon is based on his v1 figure, and, as has become the trend for the line in recent waves, that’s a pretty direct, shot for shot update.  Like 25th before, the approach here is if the v1 figure did it, so does this one.  Apart from one small bit of sci-fi detailing replacing his radio on his shoulder, he’s all v1.  Falcon’s sculpt is an all-new one, and one that’s been the source of some contention in the fanbase.  There were some complaints earlier in the line that Joes were all winding up a little too pretty, so Hasbro’s evidently trying to course-correct a bit.  The end result means that Falcon winds up looking somewhere between John Wayne and Rondo Hatton, which on one had isn’t quite what you’d anticipate for the character, but is on the other hand is consistent with Falcon’s tendency to look funk ugly when it comes to toys (his 25th Anniversary figure being a prime example of this).  There’s been a lot of fuss about this head sculpt since the figure was shown off, and while it’s not my favorite, it does at least look a bit better in hand than it did in the prototype shots.  I honestly think it’s the paint on the lips that’s throwing the look off the most; beyond that, he’s just got slightly more defined features than I think he should have.  But, for me personally, the head’s really not the issue.  It’s kind of everything else.  The core body’s not bad, I suppose.  There’s not really a lot that can go with fatigues on a basic body.  It’s really the add-ons that cause issue.  The only non-issue is the beret, which is removable, but actually sits in place alright, and doesn’t look too bulked up.  The belt/suspenders/tails for the shirt are all one piece, which is free floating.  It’s very difficult to get it to sit right during posing, and it’s usually popping up oddly at the shoulders.  There’s a non-function knife in a sheath sculpted on, because the v1 had a a non-functioning knife in a sheath, and we’re recreating that, I guess.  The neckerchief is likewise a free-floating add-on piece, and it…well, it just doesn’t sit in place.  Like, at all.  Always out of place.  Just there to annoy you, really.  It’s all just really fiddly.  The paint work is pretty standard stuff.  He’s designed to emulate the v1, and he does that.  There’s the weird paint on the lips, which I don’t like so much, but he’s otherwise alright.  The accessories are where the issues really ramp up again.  Since we’re just emulating the v1, this Falcon gets a shotgun, backpack, and knife, just like that one.  Since the v1 Falcon’s shotgun had a stock, this one does too, though it’s been designed to fold up…in theory.  In practice, there’s no configuration, fully folded, or fully unfolded, where the thing doesn’t just fall apart.  The knife’s a knife; not a lot to do with that.  It’s too small to be gripped by his hands properly, which is certainly frustrating.  It’s designed to slot into the sheath on his backpack because that’s what the v1 figure did, but the sheath is *also* too loose, so it falls out a lot.  Of course, that’s a minor thing, since the backpack is also almost impossible to keep attached to his back.  Since it’s totally flat, so as to mimic the v1 piece, it doesn’t actually contour to his back at all, so there’s nothing but a very small peg securing it in place.  And that peg has to also contend with the suspenders popping up and knocking it out of place, so it just falls out a lot.  Like the add-ons, it makes the figure very fiddly, and hard to mess with.

THE ME HALF OF THE EQUATION

I was really hyped for Classified when it launched, and it’s first year it was really a highlight of my collecting.  I really dug the updates to the old designs, and that sort of sci-fi, high-tech feel, which kept up the spirit of the older toys, without being strict recreations.  Unfortunately, as we’ve seen multiple times before, Joe fans get pretty nasty when they aren’t getting those strict recreations, so the line has shifted towards that.  I’ve got the vintage figures.  I’ve got the 25th updates of those figures.  I don’t really feel an undying need to buy the, again, but larger.  So, my enthusiasm for the line’s been kind of waning overall.  But, I do like my ’87 movie cast, so I was down for Falcon, even if he was just a strict update.  Unfortunately, he’s…well, he’s just no fun.  The overly fiddly nature of the figure made for one of the most infuriating photo shoot experiences I’ve had in some time, and also served to shatter the glass on the whole line for me, and make me realize I haven’t actually been enjoying it for quite a while.  At this point, I’ll pick up the occasional figure here and there, but I’m definitely scaling way back.

Thanks to my sponsors over at All Time Toys for setting me up with this figure to review.  If you’re looking for cool toys both old and new, please check out their website and their eBay storefront.